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I’ve written a lot about coming off Instagram in the last few months. Stepping away from the app gave me so much: less anxiety, increased productivity, increased focus, less stress and lots more besides. I was working in a time frame that suited me and not my self-imposed social media deadlines. I didn’t feel constantly like time was slipping away from me. My head wasn’t clouded with other people’s thoughts. And I discovered lots about myself: the way I worked, what my passions truly were and what the future might hold for me. It was rather wonderful and I didn’t miss the app at all. This week, however, I returned to the app. Sort of. I’ve uploaded to Instagram twice this week and also uploaded a dozen or so Instagram Stories. It was lovely to receive so many messages from people welcoming me back. But those two photos on my main feed will be the only ones I upload this week and today, as I write this, I won’t be clicking on the app at all. And I definitely won’t be on there over the weekend. That’s what I mean by ‘sort of’ being back. Maybe I’ll drop by a couple of times a week. Maybe once. Maybe every now and again. Whilst it was nice to be back in contact with so many people, at the same time I am well aware that I never want Instagram to interrupt my life again as much as it once did. I don’t want to be that person who would finish writing a paragraph and then automatically pick up my phone in order to take photographs and document what I was doing. I don’t want to be that person who cannot think clearly or with focus because I’m also thinking about what to post next on Instagram. I don’t want to be that person who has a tight chest from shallow breathing because I feel time pressured by the app; that I need to multi-task and share everything I’m working on. No. No. No. Never again. If I’ve learned one thing this year it is that my attention span must be protected at all costs. I have to be selective on what I spend my time on. This is key if I want to grow as a writer and if I want to grow my business. It is so important. Protecting my attention span has enabled me to gain a clear understanding of what I want to do with my writing and my business. It has enabled me to set up the mentoring side of my business and to have, crucially, plenty of time for my clients without it encroaching on my writing projects. The time saved from not being on Instagram is huge. It has enabled me to make tweaks within my business model and subsequently I feel more positive than I’ve ever been that I’m on the right track. I’ve written a number of times in my Patreon essays about going down the wrong path and finally I feel I have a purpose; a path to follow. For a long time, without any conscious thought, I had social media at the centre of everything I did. Setting up Instagram flatlays, baking purely to take a photo that would get lots of likes, arranging eggs from my chickens in a pleasing way on the table, scouring the garden for flowers or feathers that I could use in my photographs. Taking part in sponsored posts without any clear idea of what direction I’d like to go in and whether it was right for me. I was so invested in it I didn’t realise what I was doing. Instagram and more recently YouTube were my priorities. A YouTube video would take me more than two days a week to create. And all for what? Where did I think I was going with all of this? Why was I doing it? I had no idea because I was entrenched. When I pulled away from the app, for sad reasons at the time, it actually did me a massive favour. To use a cliche the scales fell from my eyes. A couple of years ago I was driving in the car and thinking: life would be so much simpler without Instagram. Yet I did nothing about it and kept going on the hamster wheel. This year I came away and found that was indeed true. Life was so much simpler without it. Now I’m back (occasionally) on the app but I feel confident that it’ll never take over my life again. I’ve shifted my writing to the centre of everything I do and I feel aligned, focused and driven. I will not be distracted by social media - particularly Instagram - again. Fool me once, Instagram, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
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